Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Dang. I mean, yeesh. Wow! Weird!

Dang. I mean, yeesh. Wow! Weird! Okay, so here's what happened. I was walking along, and about to cross over a creek. It was a pretty wild creek, with lots of reeds and tall grass growing in it. So, I'm walking across this man-made Road Bridge, over the creek, and I see this thing moving in it. This thing moving in the creek. At the front of it, where its mouth probably was, there were a bunch of reeds and grass sticking up out of the water. It had these things in its mouth, these tall pieces of grass and stuff. So, I pretty much stopped immediately and froze, and looked at it really hard. I thought to myself, dang, what the fuck is this? A fucking platypus or something? Pardon my language, but that's what I was thinking and what I kind of said out loud, in a sort of whisper. I watched it and it kept coming toward me, and I had the ridiculous thought that it was a cartoon animal, swimming along underwater, and using a hollow reed for a snorkel. I happened to be munching on a pretzel at that moment, so I spit it out into my hand and threw it into the creek. I thought to myself, damn, that'll stop that thing. I was sure that it would go after the pretzels. But hell no, that thing just kept on swimming, with the shittiest bouquet in the world, sticking out of the water in front of it. As it was about to pass under the little piece of road I was standing on, I threw more pretzels at it, and I even yelled at it. I think that I said, "Yo yo yo, hey, pretzels! You're missing the pretzels! Dummy! Wtf?" Then I got a closer look at it, and I thought that it was either a beaver, or an armadillo. Or a platypus. or a really hairy turtle. Heck, I don't know what it was, but whatever it was, it was on a mission with that bouquet of weeds.