Saturday, July 3, 2010

The perpetual never-ending offer

Today it's my day off and it's raining. We were supposed to have a 4th of July party with the other furriers, but we decided that a barbecue in the rain probably wouldn't be much fun, so we all said F it. Besides, I'm a little hung over. Scott and I had a male bonding session last night and once again I was invited to come out with him and 'get laid'. He's got these two go-to girls, and he's constantly trying to hook me up with one of them. The 'rebound girl' thing used to work for me back when I was somebody else, but agreeing to this now would almost certainly be a bad idea... but then again, what if this, as unlikely as it seems to me, is God's will? What if this girl is somebody I should meet? What if she's the girl I'm going to marry, and I'll never know because I never actually take Scott up on his offer?

Scott says that I need to just go out and meet some girls. There is a really cute girl who works at the gas station across the street. Her name is Carly, which is stitched onto her work shirt. They actually get shirts with their names stitched onto them over there. Anyway, she always smiles real big and talks to me when I go in to buy smokes. Maybe she likes me, or thinks I'm cute, or is attracted to me. Hell I dunno, but she might be receptive if I asked her out.

Then again, I probably won't ever ask anybody out. I'm too shy, and I don't want just 'get laid' or to have a temporary girlfriend while I'm in Alaska. I want to get married and have kids. But then again, maybe I'll meet someone here and wind up staying. I guess I'll never know unless I try. I don't expect God to do everything if it's His will that I should have a wife and kids... I guess I'll probably have to do some of the leg work.

Wow, I'm really confused today. I think it's just because I'm hung over, and because Scott is constantly tempting me to go out and meet this girl. Anyway, I'm not drinking anymore of the hard liquor while I'm here. I'm sticking with beer from now on.

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