Tuesday, March 8, 2011

I'm a creep. I'm a weirdo... and that poor lady.

So I'm at work, lurking behind the dumpster and smoking a cigarette, saying "Woe to you O Earth and sea, for the devil sends the beast with wrath, for he knows the time is short. Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast, for it is a human number. It's number is six hundred and sixty six," in my deepest, evilest British voice. You know, just being generally creepy, when I came around the corner and there was this lady standing there. Well, I paused mid-growl and she looked at me with fear stricken eyes for just a second, and then I smiled and she smiled and we looked at each other for another couple of seconds in awkward silence. Then she recognized my signature ShmelvinElvin shirt and came to. Apparently she also recognized authority when she saw it, because she motioned to her car, which was all wrecked to crap on one side, and asked me to please notify the driver of the Coca Cola delivery truck, which she had backed into, and which wasn't damaged at all. Well, I had to call the cops and it was just a big mess, and that poor lady. Just, her car was all smooshed, and well, crap. Bad luck. That poor lady.

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