Friday, June 21, 2013

Yeah, I guess that kinda sums me up, if I lived in fantasyland.

You Are A:

Neutral Good Human Cleric (5th Level)

Ability Scores:
Strength- 11
Dexterity- 12
Constitution- 13
Intelligence- 11
Wisdom- 13
Charisma- 12

Neutral Good- A neutral good character does the best that a good person can do. He is devoted to helping others. He works with kings and magistrates but does not feel beholden to them. Neutral good is the best alignment you can be because it means doing what is good without bias for or against order. However, neutral good can be a dangerous alignment when it advances mediocrity by limiting the actions of the truly capable.

Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.

Clerics- Clerics act as intermediaries between the earthly and the divine (or infernal) worlds. A good cleric helps those in need, while an evil cleric seeks to spread his patron's vision of evil across the world. All clerics can heal wounds and bring people back from the brink of death, and powerful clerics can even raise the dead. Likewise, all clerics have authority over undead creatures, and they can turn away or even destroy these creatures. Clerics are trained in the use of simple weapons, and can use all forms of armor and shields without penalty, since armor does not interfere with the casting of divine spells. In addition to his normal complement of spells, every cleric chooses to focus on two of his deity's domains. These domains grants the cleric special powers, and give him access to spells that he might otherwise never learn. A cleric's Wisdom score should be high, since this determines the maximum spell level that he can cast.

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

The 'Oh Crap' Effect

A few minutes ago as I was walking south on Bonnie Brae, I had just passed the new electrical substation when a coyote ran across the road in front of me. I immediately whipped up my flashlight and followed it as it crossed. It was looking at me the whole time it was running, and it's eyes glowed blue.

Once on the other side of the road, it disappeared into the underbrush, and I thought that I had lost it. I poked around in the bracken from a distance with the flashlight beam for a while, using it as an appendage to stir up the detritus and to sweep away the shadows. As I approached the copse where the coyote had disappeared, sweeping my light back and forth, I briefly illuminated a pair of bright blue pinpricks. I quickly swept the beam back again, but before I could completely change direction, another pair of disembodied sparks was revealed floating in the darkness... and then another, and another, and another, one right after the other, as if a stage-hand was illuminating them on cue for maximum dramatic effect.

In all, four pairs of eyes regarded me from the bushes. None of them moved for the entire time I had them in my flashlight beam, which was for at least thirty seconds, and nary a sound was emitted. Then I realized that four coyotes could probably have me for dinner, so I high tailed it.

A friend of mine, after reading this, referred to my experience as the 'Oh Crap' effect:

"You find something that seems pretty cool or cute, and you think, 'Oh how cute' or 'Oh how cool'.  Then your brain kicks you mentally in your face going, "Hey you stupid muppet, this is dangerous."  Only then does it dawn on you, that feeling of  Oh crap..." 

Although I think that in order to get the full 'Oh Crap...' effect, you need to crap your pants too.