Tuesday, April 19, 2016
See that? The picture? More often than not, that's what makes me go ass-over-teakettle when I'm walking and minding my own beeswaxiness. I'll give a brief description of what it's like to encounter that thing in the picture:
It's dark out, and I'm walking on the sidewalk (when there is a sidewalk, otherwise it's either in somebody's yard, or right in the big-ass middle of the road), just tooling along, listening to music or typing up some kind of crap like this, or filling up my brain crevices with words and pictures from teh interwub, when suddenly, and without warning...
AMBUSH! SNEAK ATTACK! SHOKINAW!
Suddenly my steady stridely impetus is violently interrupted! I find myself without forward leg support, and my cerebellum goes into overdrive, commanding the other leg to HURRY UP, HURRY UP, HURRY UP! while at the same time, activating the OMCS (override manual control sequence) procedure for my arms, forcing both of them to enact violent pinwheeling counter-rotations! An emergency application of centripetal force as a brutal attempt to absorb the unexpected and violent downward/forward momentum of the core personage! Blatant chaos ensues, as Order and Entropy grapple for control of the application of Pure And Unaligned Motive Energy!
Whew. Luckily I caught myself this time, because my cerebellum kicks ass, just like my immune system.
So... Does that sound exciting? Dramatic? Does the description capture the 'Holy Crap, All Balls Out, One-And-A-Half Second Struggle For Control', describing the brief but furious battle between the Dark side and the Light? The fight to keep me, myself, I, from doing a violent and abrupt faceplant on the concrete sidewalk, likely resulting in yet another broken hand/phone combo?
I hope it came across that way, because that's the only reason why I took that picture and typed up all of this crap and put it online.